Boats and Birds
by Catgirl Akai
Summary: Vampire fic. The Akatsuki want Shukaku, but neji wants Gaara. Many pairings. NejiGaara, ItachiOrochimaru, onesided SasukeLee in the future. This is a joint fic with Corvin. Rated for language and lemony goodness.
1. It begins

Akai here bringing you more Neji/Gaara goodness. This'll be a joint fic with my mate, Corvin. I'll do one chapter, she'll do the next. So since i'm starting off, i'm writing all the odd numbered chapters and she's got even numbers. Got it memorized?

Good.

This is a VAMPIRE fic. Just because me and Corvin are random and cool like that. Gay vampires? Yes. You a fan? Please read and enjoy. Reviews are very much appreciated. Don't like don't read.

This chapter is really rather short. Just setting things up and seeing how many of you lovely folk enjoy the fic.

**Disclaimers**: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. If i did much yaoi would ensue. I do not own Mark Twain or any of his works. I simply enjoy reading them. (You should check out the Mysterious Stranger, great book.) I do not own Boats and Birds nor do i own Gregory and the Hawk. I simply enjoy the song and am using the title for now. It may or may not change. That depends on how the story progresses and what Corvin wants.

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Gaara shot out of his bed and surveyed his surroundings. That was certainly his room. And these were certainly his clothes. "Was it all a dream?" he wondered aloud looking out the window piecing together his memories of that night.

_The redhead sat on that same old bridge again. He came here to think often. To contemplate the reason for his existence or if he existed at all which often make him think he read far too many books. The most recent one was Mark Twains the Mysterious Stranger. That had been quite the mind fuck as Gaara had so eloquently put it to his brother. _

_But yes, night after night the insomniac came and sat on this bridge listening to the wave's crash underfoot. It was calming. The sweet burn of salt in his nostrils cleared his thoughts. The wind blowing through his hair made him smile slightly, Just a twitch of his lips that could barely be distinguished from his usual scowl. _

"_So what will it be tonight, Gaara? Will you have the courage?" a voice asked from behind him. He turned and was faced with a familiar face. _

"_What are you doing here Sasuke?" he asked raising a brow at his classmate. "I come here to watch you sometimes. My boss is interested in you." _

"_Interested in me?" _

_In an instant the petite boy was surrounded by –he counted- five men in strange cloaks. Sasuke charged at him with a knife and Gaara quickly grabbed the arm the knife was in and twisted so the knife was being pressed against Sasuke's throat rather then his own. "Hm, and I thought I was going to be a knight in shining armor" said a pale-eyed man who was dusting his clothes off after killing the four other men. _

"_Neji" Sasuke gasped before he disappeared. _

Gaara searched his clothes and found the knife securely in one of his pockets. "So it did happen…" he said crossing his arms over his chest. "Neji, huh? Well… this'll be interesting…"

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Hope you all enjoyed.

**Shameless advertisement**:

My stories: Gaara's hit list, Unrequited love is troublesome and Fear of Curry need more reviews and love.

Corvin's stories: Dark Diary, The New Family and Black Bird need more reviews and love.

All six works are Neji/Gaara centric.

You read right. All **SIX**. Together Corvin and I have written **7**. Count it. **SEVEN** of the Neji/Gaara wonderfulness you enjoy.

Reviews make us happy.

So go do that.

-scurries off to write more things-


	2. Stalker

AN: Here is the second chapter straight from the computer YAY Alrighty Another masterpiece pulled out of a random mission thing, thought of by CatgirlAkai She is the one who really deserves most of the credit YAY

Anyhoo Remember to review We loves that type of thing

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Chapter 2  
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In a grave yard there was a large commotion. A full moon lights the area perfectly. The harvest moon that had taken the hue of dried blood. Several figures were dashing past grave stones, jumping over, running around, sometimes not even dodging, but smashing right through them. Until finally, at a large crypt, the figure in front lost his footing and fell.

The others approached him with a slight caution. This man was known as a legend. One of the higher vampires that held favor with Itachi himself. Although that had changed. Itachi had ordered for the eternal slumber of this man, for a reason that the guards didn't know.

They didn't mind, the heart of nearly every lover had been stolen by the white eyed vampire in front of them. Many years later, rumors would fly in secret that he had even stolen the affection of Itachi's own lover, Orochimaru. But for now, in 1869, all they knew were either love struck thoughts that longed for a future with him. Or jealous ones that longed for revenge.

Whatever the reason, Itachi had not told them, though still they blindly followed whatever he told them.

The white eyed man stood and stared at them, he was bruised, and had he any to bleed, no doubt blood would be pouring from various wounds that he had. Despite this, his pupil-less eyes gazed at them with certain superiority, "You really think that I won't return?"

One of them spat at him, "This is an incantation by Lord Itachi himself! You will not overcome it"

The man smirked; his pearly white fangs sparkled in the moonlight. His unnatural white vampire eyes closed, "Do your worst cretin, Itachi himself could not keep me down"

With foolish rage the lower vampires charged, each hitting him with a seal that stuck to his skin, burning into it like a fire a thousand times hotter than normal. He opened his eyes, which held no trace of pain and stared at them, coldly, still with the same superiority, as he fell backwards into the crypt, and into what was supposed to be an eternal darkness.

Hurriedly they painted a few seals on the small building, using the blood of the freshly killed undertaker. With the final marking of the Uchiha fan, they closed the door, forever.

Or so they thought...

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"You have failed me"

It was a statement, not a question. The boy kneeling in front of him however, didn't even flinch. They were in a large stone room, that had stained windows and dark red, navy blue and purple. The moonlight shone through them, casting them both in an eerie glow that caused their matching pale skin, and blood red eyes to stand out.

"I have," was the reply, "But he was there."

At the front of the room sat a huge throne that almost seem to become part of the wall. It was a dark granite stone and had dark rubies on the arm rests, the legs and above the figures head. To see it, one would know that he was of some sort of nobility. The figure sitting in the huge granite and ruby encrusted throne, raised a delicate black eyebrow, "He?"

The eyes of his little brother left the floor and stared at him, "Hyuuga Neji"

Uchiha Itachi, head of the vampires, winced very slightly at the name, "I thought he slept"

"As did I elder brother, but as it would happen, he does not"

Itachi scowled, "What is his interest in the boy? Does he know of Shukaku?"

Sasuke shook his head, and at his brothers beckoning, walked closer to the throne and remained standing, "I believe he has only taken a sexual interest in the human boy" He scowled, "I have no idea how he could have woken up, but it seems he will be making a nuisance of himself"

Itachi nodded and then waved him away, "I see, well, for now we shall stand back and see what his plan is. That boy is not exactly agreeable, so he won't have an easy time"

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Gaara stood up lazily, glancing around the room as he stretched. Well, considering that it hadn't been a dream, last night had been rather hectic.

"_My boss is interested in you"_

Gaara snorted; Sasuke's boss could go fuck himself, whoever he was. He scowled, remembering more of the night as he made his way to the bathroom. Who was Neji? And why the hell did he think he would be Gaaras knight in shining armor? Gaara began to strip, if Uchiha tried touching him again that was an immediate plead for a broken nose, which Gaara would be glad to give.

The hot water streamed down his body, relaxing his normally tense muscles. He lathered the scented shampoo into his hair, closing his eyes, to prevent soap from getting into them. As he rinsed the suds out, the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. He whirled around, only fast enough to catch a shadow that passed against the bathroom window. He turned off the water and opened the shower. He ran to the window and glared outside. He hadn't been able to make out a face, as it had only been a silhouette.

His glare faltered as he leaned over and looked down. He was in the second story bathroom.

"Hurry up you brat" Yelled his father, banging on the door and startling him, "You're going to be fucking late"

Gaara shrugged it off and grabbed towel, wrapping it around his waist, he opened the door and walked past his fuming father. "Don't you fucking walk away from me"

Gaara was slammed into the wall, he barely caught himself and turned to glare at his father, "I'm almost 18," he growled, "You cant tell me what to do anymore. You can't hit me anymore"

The man sneered, but turned and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind him. Gaara scowled at the door, it had to be that bathroom, even though there was another three in the whole house.

Where Gaara lived was unseemly large, his father was the kazekage, he basically ran the city. They lived in a three story house, in the middle of the city, Sunaga. Kankurou had been the more rebellious one, he joined a band, and had actually succeeded, and was currently on tour. Temari still lived at home, she said she didn't know what she wanted to do with her life. Their father had always favored her the most and allowed her to stay without question. Then there was Gaara. His room was on the second floor. He was sure that his father had purposefully given him the smallest room possible. He would have preferred the third floor. But despite his preferences, that floor of the house remained mostly unused.

Gaara pulled on his school uniform, a simple white button up shirt, that came in wither a long sleeve or a T shirt. Gaara had chosen the long sleeve, and some black pants and black shoes. Gaara had never been fond of the outfit, but he didn't complain like some of the nuisances that he went to school with. He was a senior and Sunaga high, and he was very ready to graduate. He didn't care where he went, just somewhere away from there. Where he could be alone.

He walked down the same street he had been taking for years, down to the bus stop, because his father hated him too much to get him a car. Forget that, his father didn't even let him buy his own car.

He stepped onto the bus and walked to the back, where most people knew by now to avoid. He had been in many fights on that bus. So all the usuals knew to stay the hell away.

After about twelve blocks, the bus stopped and he climbed out, shoving some guy on a cell phone just for the hell of it. The man fell forward and hit his face against the window, which Gaara could only assume looked like it hurt. The cell phone smashed against the window and Gaara wondered if it broke. He watched as if in slow motion as the man's blood from his nose, leaked down his face and on the glass. It slightly reflected the sun, and glinted against the solar light.

Gaara smirked, that was what life was about. He usually wanted people to leave him alone. But sometimes, just sometimes, a little acknowledgment was nice. That was his reason for the random acts of violence...Well, that and violence was funny.

He walked into the large building that was his school, ignoring the various stares that followed him. Paired with being a child of the kazekage, he had always been the black sheep in any social setting he was put in. Not that he minded.

He entered his class and walked to the back of the room. He set his things down and glanced around. This was his first period English class, an honors class that he shared with a certain Uchiha who was going to get hurt as soon as he arrived.

He sat in there for around ten minutes, reading a book called A Clockwork Orange, when students started piling in, but no Sasuke. Around ten seconds later the bell rang. He didn't bother looking up from his book, until he heard the door open again.

"MY YOUTHFUL CHILDREN!" announced the teacher Gai, "IT APPEARS WE HAVE A NEW ADDITION TO OUR WONDERFUL CLASS! LET US BE KIND AND CARING SO THAT WE MAY SHARE OUR YOUTHFUL EXUBERANCE!"

The class stared at him in slight fear, though they had all been in his class for nearly two months. However the attention was quickly drawn from the teacher to the very attractive teen next to him.

"PLEASE SHARE SOME OF YOUR AMBITIONS WITH US!" Cried Gai striking a pose (I love him XD)

Neji scanned the class coldly and returned his white gaze to Gai, "To win the affections, of a certain red haired youth." He turned his head, deliberately staring at Gaara, then smirked in a way, only a sex beast such as himself could.

"AH! THE SPRING TIME OF YOUTH IS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL THING!" cried Gai with large tears running down his face.

Neji looked at him and nodded slowly, and took a small step away. Gai stood up and smiled at Neji, striking a nice guy pose, his teeth glinting, "WELL THEN MY YOUTHFUL STUDENT! YOU MAY SIT NEXT TO THE RED HAIRED YOUTH IN THIS CLASS! PERHAPS YOUR YOUTHFUL ATTITUDE OF LOVE MAY RUB OFF ON HIM!"

All eyes then turned to Gaara who was currently staring at Neji in a bit of shock, at what he had just said.

Neji made his way to the back of the room with inhuman grace. Whispers followed him as students immediately began with some sort gossip or another that was obscenely untrue. Neji didn't seem to care however, as he slid into the desk beside Gaara.

"Why hello," he purred to the redhead, "Fancy seeing you here"

Gaara glared at him, "I don't know who you are, or what the hell happened last night, but don't fucking talk to me"

Neji smirked as Gaara turned away and continued to read his book. Something about Neji was a bit unnerving, not that he would admit it. Especially his teeth. 'Loser probably got some kind of surgery to make them sharp like that'

Neji frowned at his love interest's lack of attention on him, so he took out a book and began to read.

"OH NO!"

All heads turned to the back of the room again, as a loud distressed voice broke the ten minute silence.

Neji was staring at the book with a contrite look on his face, "Roger had been lying to Tiffany!" He cried looking up at the class, "THE WHOLE TIME!"

He looked back down and continued to read as the class began to chuckle.

Gaara glared at him, "you're fucking weird" he muttered

Neji laughed, "You're fucking cute"

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"Oh my gawd!" exclaimed TenTen, a brown haired junior who crushed on pretty much everyone. Her sights were now set on a certain white eyed, sharp toothed boy.

"Look there he goes" squealed Ayame, who accompanied her on her escapades that usually resulted in a one night stand with a guy who just got way too creeped out.

Neji leaned against a wall of lockers, watching Gaara who was about twenty feet away, shove his reading book and a bag lunch in his locker. Neji smirked, unknowingly making two girls squeal and nearly faint. His Gaara had refused to look at him, because of his earlier comment. It was ok though, he would not be able to resist for long.

Gaara hated life immensely, not only was he being watched, but Sasuke was missing from school. He had passed numerous girls who were mourning his absence. Gaara was disappointed that he couldnt get his vengeance.

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After a long two classes of being stalked by some wanna be vampire guy, Gaara's patience was wearing extremely and dangerously thin. Neji had been following him around, to his locker, to his classes...Gaara twitched… to the bathroom.

He was on his way to class after lunch, when suddenly he felt a familiar prickly feeling on the back of his neck. He turned around and came face to face with Neji who was smirking down at him.

"Hello again"

Gaara took a step back and stared at him, "get the hell away from me"

Neji grinned, revealing his sharp, white fangs that matched his eyes. "I can't promise that you will stay away from me" He had leaned closer without Gaara noticing and suddenly, Gaara was pulled against his shockingly cold body. He winced when something wet and almost icy slid from the base of his neck to his ear. Neji blew on it, making Gaara flush bright red, "Now can I?"

He smirked one last time before walking away, and leaving him alone. Gaara bit his lip and tenderly touched where Neji had licked, _'Subaku no Gaara does not blush'_

His stunned look melted away and was replaced with one of fierce and frightening rage never before seen by mankind.

"Neji you are so castrated"

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End Chapter

Thats all I got, but YAY FOR CATGIRL WHO UPDATES WAY FASTER THAN ME! Remember! Review this, because it feeds our souls! And if you havent already, check out our other fics and review them as well, WE WANT LOOVE! Apologies for the shortness!

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Note from Akai: WOOT. Corvin updated and it's awesome! -praise-

I'm half done with chapter three already. It's way longer then my chapters usually are cause i felt bad posting two to three pages when Corvin posts like from 6-10. So yeah. I'm making it longer.

Oh, and according to Corvin we're not allowed to reply to reviews in chapters anymore or something so i'm just going to respond to you all personally.

Anywho. Hoped you enjoyed this update! Look forward to my update later!


	3. Gaara eats gifts of love

Akai here! Marlo's (Corvin's) chapter two was awesome, no?

I'm all done with chapter three. Hope you all enjoy reading as much as i enjoyed writing this. I think it's super funny.

I must put a **warning** however. There is some lemon flavored goodness in this chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of its characters. Etc. Etc.

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Gaara went through his morning business in his usual fashion when he heard a knock at his door. "What?" he asked not facing the door. If it was his dad he would have just barged in saying something rude. So he knew it was Temari coming to ask something. "Gaara, I need your assistance" she said leading him to her room and pointing at her computer.

"What in blazes does that say?"

He leaned over the computer examining the phrase in Kankuro's email.

_GHE-HETOE FABEWLUS_

"The hell? Oh… OH! It says ghetto fabulous" he said with a nod then he paused. "Oh lord… I'm mad I could read that" Temari laughed and sat at her desk. "Yeah. I'm gonna go hang myself now" Gaara said turning and mumbling to himself about the world ending soon.

Then he turned back "wait… An email from Kankuro" he said calmly pushing Temari out of the seat and reading over it.

_Greetings and salutations my dearest siblings,_

_I'm currently in a town… I don't know its name. But it's nice. Not hot like where you poor folk reside. Bwua ha ha. Anyway. Things go well. Touring is awesome. Being in a band is awesome. Getting all the ladeh's is awesome. You guy's are totally missing out and I laugh at your misfortune. _

_Now that I'm done shoving this in your faces. _

_Temari: How are things with that Shika guy? ZOMG DON'T GET PREGGERS!_

_Gaara: You need to get laid. DON'T KILL ME! No. But seriously. Get laid. _

_Much love, _

_Your brother, Kankuro, who you will surely kill upon seeing again. _

Gaara glared at the screen. Kankuro enjoyed playing the fuck with Gaara game. Which is a game that Gaara doesn't like playing. He stepped over his sister who was still on the floor being dramatic and went to catch the bus.

Of course the kids on the bus were smart, they didn't play the let's fuck with Gaara game. On the way to the main entrance he spotted the guy he'd pushed into a car window the previous day and smirked. That huge nose-cast was going to put a nice big hole in his social calendar. How wonderful!

The kids in the hallway knew better then to play the let's fuck with Gaara game. The kids in his first period class knew better. Today was going to be ok. People feared Gaara. They didn't play games he couldn't win. But then he saw Sasuke still wasn't in school. Then he remembered he was being stalked.

That's when he spotted a rose and a note on his desk and the pale-eyed suitor giving him a smirk as he took his seat. He opened the note with a sigh. '_Blah, blah, blah, I'm not a poet. But we should go out.' _

Gaara paused, read the note over looked up at Neji. Read the note over, looked at the rose. Read the note over and finally picked the rose up sniffed it and bit all the petals off in one smooth chomp. He looked over at Neji as he chewed on his love gift. Swallowed, smiled evilly at the boy whose jaw had dropped and pulled his book out to continue reading.

Yeah. Today was going to be ok.

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After first period Neji didn't bother following Gaara. He had… he had! Neji didn't even want to think about it. How could he do such a thing to his gift of love? It was like he ate his HEART. Stole his very pulse… well… that could work if he HAD a pulse in the first place. But he'd kicked Neji's pride in the private region and that wasn't very nice. 

He was going to have to actually work for this one. His wonderfully good looks and charm alone wouldn't be enough for this red haired beauty. No, he had to come up with a good plan. Sabaku no Gaara would be his…

"YOU!" screamed someone from down the hallway causing Neji to turn and raise a brow. Who dared interrupt his scheming? "YOU HAVE CONQURED THE HEARTS OF MANY BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS IN A SHORT TIME, I BEG THAT YOU TEACH ME YOUR SECRET SO I MAY WIN THE HEART OF SAKURA-SAN!" Rock Lee that's who!

"…um" Neji said while his eye twitched. This guy was a carbon copy of his first period teacher, Gai-Sensei. That hair cut… those… those eyebrows! "God help me" he muttered a look of fear spreading across his face. This kid needed a serious readjustment. What was with those green tights?

Neji paused and contemplated things. Why should he help this weirdo with the scary eyebrows? He had things to plan, red heads to rape, bitches that needed to get put in their place. Oh yeah, he hadn't forgotten that whole lock him up in a crypt for a few decades thing. Itachi and his little pets were going to pay for that one.

He looked over the weird boy considering how he could use him then a light bulb went off in his head. "I will teach you my ways, young grasshopper… but I need a favor" he added with a smirk. Lee nodded while tears of gratefulness streamed down his face.

"ANYTHING!"

"Follow me" Neji said leading the boy to the boy's locker room. When he was sure no one else was around he pounced on Lee taking a mental note never to get on this boy's bad side. He sure could throw a punch! A few moments of struggling later Neji stood and observed his work. "Nice" he whispered circling his new creation. "Very nice…"

Starting from the top: Lee's hair was now spiked in strange angles looking dangerously pointy; Neji's note to self: Never got head-butted by this kid. Next: Neji was unfortunately unable to do anything about the boy's eye brows… the huge masses of certain doom would remain as such. Clothing: Yum, leather. Neji's not to self: leather makes everything better. Make Gaara wear tight leather pants.

"This will help me win Sakura's love?"

"Certainly"

"THANK YOU NEJI-KUN!" the boy bellowed causing Neji to rub his ear. That eardrum had certainly ruptured. It was good to be undead else he'd be deaf he mused. "Now about that favor…"

* * *

Gaara let out a sigh of relief. He had finally managed to make it to his locker without that pale-eyed bastard harassing him. All was right with the world. "GAARA-KUN!" 'Spoke too soon' he thought to himself letting his forehead crash into his locker. "What.Is.It?" he asked through gritted teeth. "Gai-Sensei wants you to go to the auditorium right now!" 

He looked up at Lee and raised a nonexistent brow. What was up with that new spiked hair and the leather duds? If he were any other person he would have inquired as to why the sudden change, but he wasn't any other person. Sabaku no Gaara was not concerned with the personal lives of his peers. "Why?" he asked.

"He didn't tell me, but he say's it's important"

Gaara rubbed at the red spot on his forehead. Lee wasn't one to lie. And if Gai really did want him in the auditorium it meant trouble. To go or not go, that was the question? Go and face one of Gai's weird "youthful experiences" such as moving heavy objects for a play. Or not to go and face Gai's wrath in the form of failing… no, he couldn't fail a class in his senior year. That would mean summer school… that would mean a few more months of dealing with the kazekage.

"…Fine" he said turning and heading to the auditorium.

When Gaara was out of sight Lee fell to floor dramatically, lying was just not in his vocabulary. But it had been for a good cause! He was helping his newly acquired friend enjoy his youth. And according to Neji he was tricking Gaara into seeing him because he had a huge surprise for the red head. "It must be his birthday or something!" Lee decided smiling to himself.

* * *

On the way to the auditorium Gaara was faced with many obstacles. There was a hoard of Neji fangirls that tried to glare him into oblivion. Of course, one threatening glance and they shrunk away. Then there was an unusually happy boy that Gaara had to trip causing the boy to slam into a locker. There was a terrible crunch that Gaara assumed was the sound of the boy's nose breaking. 

He smirked and continued on his way, but halfway there he spotted Gai-Sensei. He walked over to him and opened his mouth but before he could say anything he felt a sharp pain at the back of his head and then darkness. "WHY LEE, WHY DID YOU JUST KNOCK OUT YOUR FELLOW CLASSMATE?" Gai bellowed.

"FORGIVE ME GAI-SENSEI! IT IS GAARA'S BIRTHDAY TODAY AND NEJI IS ATTEMPTING TO SURPRISE HIM. I CAN NOT LET THE SURPRISE BE RUINED!"

"WHY THAT SOUNDS WONDERFUL, I SHALL HELP YOU DELIVER GAARA TO HIS DESTINATION!"

"WHY THANK YOU GAI-SENSEI!"

And they bounced off with Gaara over Gai's shoulder.

* * *

When he came to Gaara was in the auditorium tied to a chair. "What is this? The let's torture Gaara game?" he asked no one in particular. This was supposed to be a good day! This was supposed to be another day of the let's avoid Gaara's wrath game. Why did everyone want to invoke his wrath today? 

"More like the let's steal Gaara's virginity game" Neji said smirking at the small boy. Gaara scowled and swung his legs up and on each side of Neji's head twisting so his neck snapped. Neji readjusted his neck and laughed at the look on Gaara's face when his bones could be heard re-growing.

"I don't like this game… I like other games… you know… the ones where I win" Gaara said looking at the pale-eyed man before him, wide eyed. "Well that's going to be a problem since I enjoy playing games that I win" Neji said taking a seat on Gaara's lap.

"Hm. Let's see… where to begin where to begin?" he asked himself running a cold finger down Gaara's smooth face. "All of you remains so unexplored!" he said in a fashion that reminded Gaara of a younger Kankuro when he got a new toy and just had to break it apart. Wait! No! Bad comparison! Gaara did NOT want to be broken apart by this wanna be vampire freak.

Wait… he wasn't even a wanna be vampire freak. He was the fucking undead. Gaara had no stakes, garlic, no holy water. He was going to be raped… plain and simple. His thoughts were interrupted when Neji stood from his lap pulling him off the chair and onto the floor with ease.

Gaara would much prefer being back on that chair… now he was on his knees in front of a very angry dead guy. The only thing in his range of vision was that… "Holy shit it's huge" he said with an eye twitch. Neji smirked at this and pulled his length out. "Well, since you enjoy eating my gifts of love…" he said satisfied by his love interest's glare.

The red head looked over it lost in thought and then he placed his mouth over the tip and bit as hard as he could. Neji just laughed and grabbed the back of Gaara's head yanking him forward so he would suck. He heard Gaara say something inaudible and sighed pulling his head away. "What was that?"

"Doesn't that fucking hurt?"

"Nope. It was rather enjoyable" he said laughing again.

-Later that night-

Gaara lay huddled in a mass of blankets. His cheeks were red and the rings around his eyes were darker. He sneezed when Temari handed him a steaming mug of he didn't care what it was as long as it was hot. "I don't think I've ever seen you sick…" she said touching his forehead. SNEEZE.

"Fucking Hyuga…"

"You sure it wasn't in your head?"

"I KILLED him Temari"

"And then he raped you?"

SNEEZE "Yes"

"…after you killed him?"

"Oh my god! Is it considered necrophilia if you were raped by the dead thing?" he asked suddenly causing Temari to bite back a laugh. "I think you need to sleep. Why do you never take the sleeping pills I get for you?"

"I don't want a repeat of the last time" he said shooting her a glare.

-Meanwhile-

Itachi crawled out of bed slowly trying his best not to wake his lover. Orochimaru was a tangle of limbs and velvet sheets. He was sprawled out on his stomach, face buried in his pillow. He was just so beautiful when he slept… Itachi thought to himself before he pulled his eyes away to gaze out his window. A full moon… they always reminded the Uchiha of that night…

_Two centuries. That's how long the Hyuga family had been in charge. Most of the vampire community didn't mind this. That is, until a Hyuga leader had twins… There was Hyuga Hiashi and Hyuga Hizashi, Both of equal strength, both respectable members of the Hyuga clan. Hiashi went on to have a daughter, Hinata while Hizashi had a son, Neji. _

_When their father died Hiashi took his place. All was fine with the world until Neji showed great promise. He was showing signs of being the most powerful Hyuga of the next generation at a very young age. But he was bound by a curse to serve Hinata, who would become the next leader. _

_There was a silent agreement among most that Neji should become the next leader, having someone like Hinata running the show… that was appalling. Years of selective breeding would be ruined in a few decades under Hinata's rule. _

_Later when Hizashi was given over to werewolves for a treaty the situation worsened and one Uchiha would not allow vampires to be a laughing stock. That's when he devised his plan. _

Itachi's thoughts were interrupted when he felt strong arms wrap around his waist. "Come to bed, koi…" he glanced at the moon once more before climbing into the bed to be lost in a tangle of limbs, velvet and sweat.

* * *

Hope you all enjoyed it!

Ohoh and for our faithful readers: I'm going to write one more chapter for each of my other incomplete fics and end them. I'll be writing a series of oneshots that will be posted on** May 9th**. It's Marlo's (Corvin's) birthday present.

Oh, and Marlo may be starting a fic called CinderSand that she's been contemplating doing for a while.

So be sure to keep an eye out for the end of two fics, the beginning of one fic, and a series of oneshots within the next few weeks.


	4. Itachi reminisces

AN: WOW! Thanks to all who reviewed! I love you guys! Ok! Here is the pathetic continuing!

WARNING: To those of you who are opposed to the pairing OrochimaruItachi, THEY ARE PREVALENT IN THIS CHAPTER! SO NO FLAMING!

* * *

Chapter 4 

Gaara stared at Gai with more horror than he ever felt in his entire life put together, "You can't be serious"

"MY LAD!" Cried Gai, "YOU MUST LEARN TO WORK WITH OTHERS WITH A JOYOUS HEART AND-"

"BUT WHY THEM!" Interrupted Gaara, jabbing a finger in the direction of Neji and Lee. Neji smirked at the redhead's outburst; he had turned down a lot of people for this chance. Lee stood by Gai, admiring his extremely well made points and taking down notes.

"BECAUSE!" replied Gai, "THEY NEED A THIRD MAN FOR THEIR CHOICE OF PROJECT!"

Gaara twitched, "My choice was solo, and I refuse to work with THAT!" He glanced at the direction he was pointing and realized it was at Lee, after taking a moment to make sure he was finger glaring at Neji, he stared at Gai once again.

"Don't be like that," purred Neji, sliding up beside him noiselessly, "You are hurting my youth"

"SEE THERE!" Exclaimed Gai, "YOU MUST ENCOURAGE OUR NEW STUDENT GAARA! JUST LIKE LEE!"

"YOSH!" Exclaimed Lee, "COME ALONG TEAMMATES! LET US FINISH OUR PROJECT!"

What is it about this project that has Gaara so angry you ask? Well, according to the paper that had the choices on it, his task was to go to study hall for the rest of the day and research for a group paper that would be presented to the class. Why did this bother him? Well, because one of them had to go around to all the classes and inform the teachers the reason for their absence, and get makeup work. And Lee, being the helpful bundle of joy and energy that he is, so sweetly volunteered to do it.

Gaara glared at the floor on his way to, what would most definitely, be an empty room. Other than Neji and himself of course. "If you try anything," he muttered, "I'll cut your head off"

Neji laughed, "You can't kill me," he reminded him, "So I don't know what good you think you will be doing for yourself"

"Hmph," retorted Gaara, "Maybe so, but I would imagine that you would have a difficult time with another rape attempt if you did not have a body"

When they reached the room, Neji stepped ahead of him and opened the door, "I can't rape the willing my lovely"

Gaara snorted and brushed past him, "Don't flatter yourself, and don't come near me"

(With Lee)

"EXCUSE ME TEACHER OF MY YOUTHFUL PEER!" bellowed Lee entering Gaara's classroom and scaring the students currently occupying it, half to death, "BUT I WILL NEED SUBAKU NO GAARA'S ASSINGMENTS FOR THE DAY! HE IS WORKING WITH-"

"ALRIGHT!" Yelled Asuma, "Here! Just take it! No! I don't want to see the note! I'll take your word for it"

Lee smiled, pocketing the piece of paper, "OH! ASUMA-SENSEI!-"

"Nooo!" Cried Asuma, "JUST GO!"

With a parting 'nice guy' pose, Leee left the room to go be awesome in Neji's second period. Which would be a mysteriously similar repeat to every other class he would visit.

'I hope my comrades are getting along'

(Back to the two sex gods...er, Gaara and Neji)

"Stop TOUCHING ME!"

Neji stared at him with feigned innocence, "But I'm on the other side of the room"

Gaara held the back of his neck protectively, "I don't know how you're doing it, but if you do it again, I'LL BREAK YOU FUCKING FACE!"

Neji looked back down at the book he was holding upside down, about the beauty of menstruation periods, "What an accusation!" Gaara stiffened when he suddenly felt a cold hand sliding up his shirt, "And such fire" was whispered in his ear. Gaara jumped out of his chair and tackled the Hyuuga with a loud battle cry, "DEATH TO POINTY TEETH!"

Neji was laughing hard as Gaara tried to strangle him with his own hair. He started trying to break free, but only resulted in them rolling around the floor. Neji, trying to calm Gaara down so that maybe he could take advantage of their comfortable position, and Gaara trying with all his might to kill Neji.

They froze however, when they heard someone sniff in the doorway. With Gaara resting on top of Neji and between his legs, and hard breathing from both of them, Lee bit his knuckle with large tears running down his face, "YOU'RE FINALLY GETTING ALONG!"

* * *

(Itachi and Orochimaru) 

The older Uchiha sighed as he sat in front of a fire in a large, red plush chair. He watched the dancing red light with little interest, his mind was somewhere else. They needed the red haired boy, for the preservation of their race. The vampires were getting less and less, and the blood was getting thinner and thinner. The old ways were dying and more and more hotshots were becoming vampires and thinking they could overthrow him.

But with Neji awakened, would he seek revenge for his fallen family? Hiashi had been a good leader, but with the death of his twin brother, he had become far too emotional and things had gone down hill. He supported the Hyuuga family, but he would not let their race lose existence, because their leader was too in touch with human sorrow to pay attention to his duties. He didn't want Neji to get in the way, bound by family loyalties and duties. That was the only reason he locked the boy up in the first place.

They needed more thorough breeds. Most vampires in the present were sired little weaklings who would go out and get themselves killed by hunters. Some of them were wise in their ways, like Orochiamru had been.

Itachi smiled softly at the thought, yes, he remembered.

-Flashback-

He looked like a teenager still. Perhaps barely older than 16 or 17. He was following a human who looked about 20, jumping from roof to roof.

Itachi's red eyes flashed in the night. He spotted a lone figure walking down an alley. The year was 1689, and he was hunting for his prey. He followed the person closely, blending perfectly with the shadows that covered the walls and rooftops. He smirked as the figure paused near a small heap of garbage. He was poised to attack; his eyes were set on the ashen white neck that was hidden by black hair that reached halfway down their back. Suddenly he heard a sound that caused him to pause, the heap had whimpered.

"Why are you out here?" The figure asked

"I-I live here"

"I see. Are you hungry?"

"Y-yes"

"How would you like to come stay with me? You can have food and clothes, and a bed that is much more comfortable than the ground"

Itachi raised a curious eyebrow as the child looked up at the man, "Y-yeah, please!"

The man turned and started walking away, the child stood hastily and followed him, "What's your name mister?"

"My name is Orochimaru"

69696969(A few months later)69696969

He had been on Itachi's mind constantly since that night. He ran an orphanage, where the children that stayed there worked hard each day, making toys to be sold.

Itachi went to watch him often, he had stopped various burglars from breaking in, prevented a few fires, and every now and then, he even left little gifts for him on the doorstep. He didn't tell anyone, and he would never tell anyone that a human had caught his interest. But he loved looking at the man. Itachi found out that he was indeed 22, and he had lived as an orphan himself, since he was 8.

He had black hair that went to the center of his back, almost unhealthily pale skin and narrow golden eyes that captivated the Uchiha. He was tall, and extremely slender, though it looked natural on him. He seemed to have natural pointed canines, which even amused Itachi at some times. If it weren't for the smell of his human blood and a few small features, one could almost mistake him for a vampire.

Orochimaru was quite wealthy, although he stayed in the orphanage, taking care of the children himself. Most of the people thought him quite cruel, that's what Itachi had thought, before he started sneaking in. He admired him a lot. Though he often raised his voice and they were not allowed to keep any toys, the children seemed to love him. Itachi knew that he felt...something for their employer as well.

One night, Orochimaru went on his weekly walks. Itachi went after him, trailing behind him at a relatively safe distance. His interest stopped in the park, settling beneath a tree and closing his eyes. The Uchiha jumped into a tree near enough to have a clear view. Then suddenly to his surprise, Orochimaru spoke.

"I know you're there, you have been following me a few months now...I wonder why that is..."

Itachi's eyes narrowed as he mentally kicked himself. There was almost no greater insult than being caught by a human. He jumped out of the tree and approached the man, "You have known this whole time?"

He received a nod, "Then why did you not hire a hunter? Why did you not do anything?"

Orochimaru opened his eyes, fixing the Uchiha with a golden stare, "Because I wanted to know why"

Itachi shrugged, "What does that matter? For all you knew, I was going to kill you" He stepped closer and sat down, leaning against the tree, his shoulder barely touching the others. Orochimaru smirked in return to this, "Then why didn't you do it on the first night?"

Itachi didn't answer; he looked away and stared up at the leaves on the tree above them. He was shocked to say the least that the human had known the entire time, if not annoyed.

He was startled out of his thoughts when the other spoke up, "I hope you will come to see me again" He stood up without another word and walked away, leaving blood red eyes watching after him.

(During the day)

They were in a crypt. A large crypt that was only part of a huge underground system that sustained the vampires during the day.

Itachi kneeled in front of Hiashi, awaiting his request to be either accepted pr denied.

"You want to sire a human?"

"Yes Hiashi-sama"

"I see...He is not worth it Itachi. To sire a human is difficult, you shouldn't bother taking the chance for someone so insignificant"

Itachi frowned at the ground, not bothering to meet his leader's eyes, "Understood"

Hiashi nodded and Itachi stood up, with a small bow at the waist, he turned and walked out.

(Orochimaru, hours later)

That man was there again. The one from the other toy company that worked and operated in the village. They had been trying to buy him out for years, but he never gave in, because he knew that they would not take care of the children. While he would never admit it, he almost enjoyed taking care of them.

The man had been yelling in his face for around thirty minutes now, the only thought that kept him calm was the ridiculous shade of red the man's face was. Orochimaru sipped his coffee as the man stood up and was now leaning over him.

He was sure that the man would back off, but much to his surprise, he was staring a derringer, aimed at his heart. He jumped up, but the man fired, getting him in the stomach, followed by a red flow of blood.

Two children named Kimimaro and Sakon, who had been listening outside the door, ran inside and tackled him. They turned the gun him and shot his head until the ammunition was gone. Orochimaru weezed from blood loss and fell over. They ran to him and called out for the girls, Kin and Tayuya, to bring towels and water.

The last thing he remembered before drifting into his haze of unconsciousness was the face of the vampire from the night before.

(Itachi)

He entered through the window, into the room that he knew to be Orochimaru's. There was a candle lit, and the room smelled of freshly spilt blood. His eyes narrowed, "Orochimaru?"

He could sense to humans outside the door, and made a mental note to be quiet. He approached the bed and pulled back the gossamer curtain that surrounded it. He felt his stomach lurch when his eyes fell on the sleeping figure of Orochimaru. His face was noticeably whiter than before, and his breathing was shallow. Itachi knew that he was going to be dead before morning.

"You're here?"

He looked down and saw that the man's eyes were fluttering open, "I'm glad. Come join me"  
Itachi climbed onto the bed and crawled over next to him, "you are going to die"

Orochimaru closed his eyes and sighed, "I figured as much"

Itachi rested his head on the other's shoulder, "You don't have to...You know, I could make you like me"

Orochimaru opened his eyes and looked at him, "I am aware of that"

Itachi sat up and stared at him, "But on one condition"

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow, "Which is?"

"You...Have to stay with me"

Orochimaru scowled and Itachi felt his heart drop. The younger pushed himself into a sitting position, right into his face, "Sounds good" he whispered with a smirk. Itachi smiled and leaned forward, placing a small kiss on his lips and then leaning further, and sinking his teeth into the ashen white neck.

-end flashback-

"Is something wrong?"

He looked up and smiled at his lover, "I'm fine," he sighed, "I was just thinking about things..."

Orochimaru was leaning over the back of the chair and staring down at him, "What things?" He took Itachi's hand and made him stand up, "Neji perhaps?" He pulled him into a hug, which Itachi returned.

"What are we going to do?" said Itachi in distress, "Orochimaru, it was hard enough the first time. Sticking him in that crypt"

Orochimaru kissed his cheek, "Neji is not unreasonable," he said, "Perhaps we could go talk to him? I'm sure Sasuke would do it, if you don't want to venture out with things this dangerous"

Itachi sighed, "But, what if he wants to fight? What if he is angry still?"

"If he was angry, than we would have to fight him eventually, but if he has seen things from our point of view, then it will be time not wasted"

Itachi smiled, "You're right..."

Orochimaru tilted his head up and kissed him, "Of course I am," he murmured, "So what's your next move?"

Itachi grinned and pushed himself hard against his lover, "I can think of a few good ones"

* * *

(Sasuke) 

He closed his umbrella once he stepped inside, he would had to make up an excuse to his absence from school. Luckily he was probably three times older than the principal's grandfather, so he didn't miss anything he didn't already know. He had been sent here to observe the child who was rumored to be something extraordinary.

It had first been discovered ten years ago, when ten of their brethren had supposedly been killed by a human child. Upon investigating they had learned that it was the truth and that he held something they had been searching for. The Akatsuki, a vampyric organization who's goal was to preserve the vampires, had been searching for one the tailed demons for years. They needed the blood to powerfully sire child bearing vampires that could continue that thorough breed kind. It was a technique that had died with the Hyuuga legacy.

They would have it again soon though, providing that Neji did not get in the way. He hoped he would not have to fight him, he had been sad when his brother sealed him away and very surprised when he saw him awake. What was his relationship with the redhead? Did he know?

Sasuke bit his thumb; he could smell them both in a room on the second floor. There was only one thing he could do, confront Neji.

-End Chapter-

* * *

Short yes, hard to write, yes. 

REVIEW THIS! NOW! OR ELSE! I don't know if Akai warned you, but we have set a minimum of reviews that we had better get. Five reviews for each chapter, or we no update. We have other projects we could be working, that, by the way, have the same thing as this one.

PLEASE REVIEW! I'M ON MY KNEES! WE'RE DESPERATE!

* * *

A note from Akai:

Well yeah, five reviews per chapter or no update. I only have three reviews for chapter three... but since one review was really rather long. And i didn't give a warning about the limit i'll post this chapter anyway.

But i'll be keeping my chapter hostage until i get five reviews on this chapter.

Mean?

Yes. But Akai likes reviews. They make her smile.


	5. VAMPIRE HUNTER ROCK LEE!

This chapter is short. I know i know. Bad Akai. Make long chapters.

I promise i'll make chapter seven way longer then this.

But yeah. Enjoy!

* * *

Sasuke made his way to the second floor in a ninja-like manner. It was quite the difficult task to navigate the halls of a high school when you were an Uchiha. As if having flawless hair and perfect boyish looks weren't difficult enough poor Sasuke had to deal with attacks from fangirls. Especially those freaks Ino and Sakura…

After carefully avoiding all forms of attacks from the insane ones Sasuke found his path to Neji blocked…

'The hell?' he thought to himself observing the back of the person now blocking the doorway. Spiked hair that certainly whipped his own cut. Tight leather everything. Especially those pants… Whoever it was had the nicest ass the Uchiha had ever laid eyes on. Did kids from sexy town transfer into the school without his knowledge?

When the boy turned Sasuke's jaw dropped to the floor and his eyes widened to the size of two plates. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT! LEE?" he bellowed. Those eyebrows! It was unmistakable! What was the world coming to? Playing tricks with Sasuke's eyes! "What happened to you?"

"Neji-Kun is helping me win the affections of Sakura-Chan and say's this will help!"

"Ah…" he said looking over the boy. And then his eyes landed on…

"Yeah… I gotta go now!" the younger Uchiha screamed dashing to the bathroom. Why in the world was he getting a nosebleed? These things didn't happen to him! These things happened to rabid fangirls! But… Lee sure was packin… "NO!" he yelled hitting his forehead. "This can't be happening to meee!"

-Meanwhile-

The second Gaara realized Sasuke was around he jumped off of Neji and was bounding down the hall with an impressive speed. Oh yeah, Gaara didn't forget about that whole threaten his life thing. Sasuke was going to die.

This was the same thought on Neji's mind. If he didn't want to kill Sasuke before he certainly did now. He'd stolen his red haired love interest from him! And they were finally in a nice comfy position too… But his anger subsided for a moment when Lee explained Sasuke's nosebleed.

"And on the something-billionth day" Neji began "god said "let there be a mix of eyebrows and leather" and it was so." He said looking over Lee's pleasant mix of eyebrows and leather "And Uchiha Sasuke saw this and saw it was good." He said with a nod and a smirk. Lee was going to prove far more useful then he'd anticipated.

* * *

After about ten minutes of searching Gaara couldn't find that Uchiha bastard anywhere! But… he'd escaped Neji AND he didn't have to go back to class for a while! Computer time he decided heading down to the computer lab on the third floor. When he signed on he was relieved to see Kankuro was online. 

PuppetMaster: OMG! Baby brother!

BabyEater: -twitch-

PuppetMaster: Upset about that email I presume?

BabyEater: I'll let it slide… if you do me a favor.

PuppetMaster: Sure thing.

BabyEater: How do you kill vampires?

PuppetMaster: Dude… just google it.

BabyEater: You fucking google it.

PuppetMaster: Stake through the heart… holy water… wait no! That would probably hurt you too! … no… no… Gaara… I think you might be the undead…

BabyEater: You do realize this means war, don't you nii-san?

PuppetMaster: Oh, Gaara! You called me nii-san! YOU DO LOVE ME!

It's ok. I can now die happy.

BabyEater: Fuck you're weird.

PuppetMaster: I love you too my little baby eating, soul stealing bundle of joy!

BabyEater: Yeah… I'm gonna go do that school thing now.

PuppetMaster: Ks. Email me laters.

BabyEater: It'll just be a list of the many ways I could kill you.

PuppetMaster: That's ok, I'll just tell you about all the ladeh's I'm bonin and you're not.

BabyEater: I'll send you a nice get well card when you contract an STD.

PuppetMaster: later twirp

BabyEater: Laters

Gaara pulled his cell phone out after this sending a warning glare at the teacher in charge of the room. Psh, they wouldn't take his phone. When he was sure the man was intimidated enough he sent his sister a text message. "You shall soon only have one brother."

Reply: "Cheer up emo kid. Want me to go pick u up?"

Reply: "No, stupid, I meant I'm breaking Kankuro's face."

Reply: "Oh, ok! Be sure to give him a nice nose-breaker in my name!"

Reply: "Sure"

"Awe, all that brotherly affection coming from the baby-eater" sang a voice from behind him. Gaara looked over his shoulder to see Neji. His eye twitched. "How the hell do you do that?" Neji sighed wistfully "it comes with that whole being the undead thing."

Gaara sighed and then spotted a pencil… in a speed not even Neji could keep up with he picked the pencil up and jammed it into Neji's knee cap. Not even a flinch… "I hate you"

Then he felt something on his neck again and was pouncing on the vampire freak yet again. But this time it was Gai-Sensei that interrupted them. "AH, I SEE THAT YOU ARE GETTING GAARA TO ENJOY HIS YOUTH!"

Neji smirked down at the boy he was straddling and then nodded at his new favorite adult human. "Gai-Sensei, how do you kill a vampire?" Gaara asked suddenly. It was worth a try. The green-clad man was full of random information no one would ever need.

"WHY GAARA! YOUTHFUL LOVE CONQUERS ALL FOES!"

* * *

Rock Lee skipped into the boy's bathroom to relieve himself of bodily wastes. He quickly got his business over with and went to wash his hands when he saw Sasuke standing in front of the sink staring back at him with wide eyes. "ARE YOU OK?" he asked skipping past the boy to the sink. Sasuke lost about half his blood and then ran out of the bathroom. 

Uchiha Sasuke. Vampire. Sexy man of sexdom. Wait no. Scratch that. Uchiha Sasuke. Vampire. Pansy. Fanboy. About to die of blood loss.

Not only did he insult his race and clan by finding someone like Lee attractive, but he was going to die if he didn't find someone expendable… "Ah, Sakura!" he said flashing her a smirk. "Sasuke-Kun! Where have you been? I was getting worried!"

"That's unimportant… what is important is you… and I" he said wrapping an arm around her shoulder and leading the near-fainting girl to an abandoned staircase to feed.

- A few minutes later-

"Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke" Neji said from behind the boy. "Is this what's become of our race? Sloppy, sloppy. How will you explain away this little incident? What if someone should walk in and see you?" just then Lee skidded through the doors and halted to a screeching stop in front of Sakura's corpse. "SAKURA-CHAN!" he yelled throwing himself to the floor dramatically. "NEJI! WHO DID THIS?"

"Sasuke"

"WHAT?" Lee said quickly getting to his feet and glaring daggers at our poor baby Uchiha. Sasuke merely stared back dumbstruck. Not only did he just blow his cover, but he just lost all hopes of getting into those overly tight leather pants. "I'll get my revenge on you yet" Sasuke said before disappearing.

Gaara entered the stairway just as Sasuke left and cursed. Second time he lost that bastard. "Whoa, who killed her?" he asked stepping over the weeping Lee to observe the bite marks on Sakura's neck. "Sasuke" Lee choked out.

Neji rubbed Lee's back for comfort with a very solemn look on his face only causing the boy to weep more. "You know… you could always avenge her, Lee. It wouldn't be murder or anything since Sasuke's a vampire."

"Really?" the boy sniffed.

"Yeah… I'm sure Gai-Sensei would approve of you being a vampire hunter. In fact I think he would be glad about it."

"YOU'RE SO RIGHT NEJI-KUN! I SHALL AVENGE SAKURA-CHAN'S DEATH!"

"Ok, let's go get you some more leather clothes"

"But why?"

"Do you want to enjoy your youth or not?"

"YES I DO!"

"Ok, so let's go"

"YOSH!"

Gaara's eye twitched as he watched what had to be the two scariest boys' he'd ever met in his life exit the stairway. "Man… Neji is SUCH a whore" he muttered to himself.

_Are you jealous?_

"Shut the fuck up" he said leaving the stairway as well.

* * *

Ohohohoh! Shukaku makes his first real appearance! 

And what's this? Sasuke enjoying Lee's leather pants?

Neji writing a new passage in the bible?

Sakura dying?

LEE'S A VAMPIRE HUNTER!

What THA FUCK?

Yeah. Really random thoughts but i could NOT help myself.

It was just too hilarious. I had to include it kekekeke.


	6. I scared myself

1AN: Ok, here is the sixth chapter. And as it would seem, some reviewed with...well, unhappy feelings towards the whole Sasuke wanting Lee thing. Yeah, I know most of us were kinda 'wtf!' But bare with us guys! Akai just wanted to have some fun with it!

I agreed to it, because, Lee never has fans and Sasuke has a million. Of course there will still be SasuNaru, but we had to give Lee some love. Are we all clear? Good! o So remember! Us authors are trying to please you, but keep you on your toes at the same time! Remember guys! We love you! And we don't want you angry, but just let us keep going without making us sad.

And one more thing! As I am a huge pervert, and many of my friends at school are finding out after knowing me for years (XD) Some are actually saying that the only people who like yaoi, are creepy fangirls like me! NOT TRUE SAYS I! There a people who are less creepy than me! Boys and girls alike! So, I would like to request that for my research, all you lovely reviewers will send in your gender, as well as why you like yaoi, in with your reviews. AND SLAM THAT JERKS FACE IN IT! (The names of the people who said it about us are TJ, Julie, Hernan and Wyatt) If you want to leave them notes as well, I will make sure that they get it! o

Chapter 1

* * *

Two lone figures stood silently on the roof, bathed in shadows. The smaller one turned to the bigger and nodded. With lightening fast, inhuman movements they leapt from their position, dissolving into thin air.

* * *

'It's so quiet'

Temari smiled, she had convinced Gaara to try going to sleep. Three hours alter, all was quiet.

She frowned, or was he trying to trick her again? She made her way upstairs as quietly as she could, cringing as the step creaked underneath the weight of her foot. After a moment, everything was still quiet, so she continued, testing every step, each one after another. She finally made it to her brother's room. Opening the door just a small crack she peered inside and found that for once in a long while, that she couldn't even remember when, he was sleeping peacefully, without that thing inside him wreaking havoc.

She smiled, and was about to leave, but suddenly, as if appearing out of thin air, she saw two men. One was tall and blue, with frightening red eyes. And the other she thought she had recognized from his school when she had picked him up before. Sasuke, with black spiked hair and eyes even more frightening than the blue man.

"What do you think Kisame?" said Sasuke, "Will it come out?"

"No." said Kisame, "It is the night of the new moon. Your brother said that the Shukaku would be too tired to actually come out until tomorrow"

Sasuke nodded, and leaned over Gaara, pulling the blankets back. He gently lifted the naturally exhausted human, and looked at Kisame. The silently addressed walked over to the window and pushed it open. They jumped out, leaving behind an empty room and Gaara's trembling sister.

Temari stood up, her knees were shaking and her eyes were wide. She placed her hand over her mouth and held in a scream. Her younger brother had just been kidnapped. Their teeth were so sharp, their eyes had been red and they jumped out the window...What did that mean?

'VAMPIRES! CALL KANKUROU!' Her mind shouted, almost startling her.

* * *

Kankurou sat up in alarm when something loud and piercing infiltrated his dreams and jerked him awake. He scratched his head and leaned over the side of the mattress, searching for his ringing cellphone.

"Right here"

He looked over his right shoulder and saw Akai, one of the band groupies, holding out his flashing little phone. With a grin he took it and answered, "What!"

("Kankurou!")

"Temari?"

("KANKUROU! ITS AWFUL! GAARA! EYES! POINTY!")

"CALM DOWN!" He yelled, effectively quieting her, "Christ Temari, do you know what time it is?"

He could hear Temari take a few breaths before answering, "Kankurou! Someone took Gaara!" He raised an eyebrow, "The little squirt finally got laid eh? Well, I really didnt-"

("NO!") She yelled, ("Someone kidnapped him! They came and took him out of his room when he was finally sleeping!"

He froze and she continued, ("I know it sounds crazy, but I think they were vampires!")

Kankurou scowled and bit his lip, Akai leaned over, trying to hear what was going on, "I see, lemme call some reinforcements! We'll be in town by morning!" Without waiting for a reply he stood abruptly, causing the girl in his bed to tumble backwards, "Gotta go!" He yelled, wrapping the sheet around his waist and zipping out of the room, "I PROBABLY WONT CALL YOU! NO OFFENCE!"

"None taken!" she called after him, laughing.

* * *

"Kiba!"

Kiba stepped out of the shower, and shook his head a little to rid his ears of any water, did someone just call him? He opened the door to his room and walked into his room, he could have sworn he'd heard something.

"KIBA!"

Ok! That was something, he went over to his dresser and pulled out some pants, it was probably Kankurou. He wondered what was wrong, their bass player, while loud, didn't usually freak out over nothing...Now a bit worried, he walked over to the door and opened it, just as Kankurou reached it.

"KIBAAA!"

Was yelled in his face, just as he had opened his mouth to ask what was the matter. Kankurou looked at him and blinked for a second, before regaining his composure. He lightly patted the younger boy's shoulder in a gesture of apology, "eh, sorry"

"What do you want?" he growled

"Someone took Gaara!"

Kiba grinned, "So he finally got laid? This calls for-"

"NOT THAT YOU IDIOT! Vampires! They just took him, Temari called me!"

"What!"

Kiba grabbed him by the collar and pulled him inside. He slammed the door shut and started rummaging through his things, "Help me find my address book!" He and Kankurou had turned the room inside out before they finally found it on Kiba's nightstand. "Here" he said tossing it to Kankurou, "Call Shikamaru. I'm going to the gun store!"

"You're gonna mug a gun club?"

"...Yes"

* * *

Shikamaru groaned when his ringing phone fell out of his roommate, Chouji's hand and onto his head, "What?" he muttered into the phone

("Shikamaru? It's Kankurou! Someone took Gaara!")

He glanced at the clock and sighed, "You called me at 2:00am to tell me this?"

("...Dude, not like that...VAMPIRES!")

Shikamaru fully opened his eyes at this, "They took him? Why?"

("We don't know, but we're rallying the troops, SO GET YOUR ASS TO KONOHA!")

Shikamaru sighed when Kankurou hung up without even saying good bye, "So troublesome" He pulled himself to the edge of the bed and looked at Chouji who had yet to leave the room, "He's not laid, pay up"

* * *

"HELLO! YOU HAVE REACHED THE YOUTHFUL HOUSEHOLD OF THE ROCKS! MAY I ASK WHO IS CALLING!"

Shikamaru flinched at the loud bellowing, 'Too early in the morning', "Uh, yeah. Listen, You're already Konoha, so listen, Gaara has been taken-"

"I KNOW! I SAW IT!"

"WHAT!" Shikamaru stared at his phone, "You saw! B-But, why didn't you stop it?"

"BECAUSE MY DEAR FRIEND! GAARA AND NEJI WERE JUST ENJOYING THE LOVE OF YOUTH!" (AN: Man is this joke getting old? XD)

"...Lee? I mean he has been kidnapped"

"...GAARA! MY DEAR YOUTHFUL FRIEND! NOOOOOOOO!"

"LEE!"

"Yes?"

"Are there any hunters in your area? Call them, and head over to Kankurou's place alright?"

"YOSH!"

"Goodbye Lee"

"GOODBYE MY YOUTH-" He paused at the dial tone and burst into sobs, "Oh! HE TRULY CARES FOR GAARA! I MUST CALL NEJI!"

* * *

Neji looked down as his cellphone started vibrating. He looked at it and raised an eyebrow, "Lee?" He looked at the clock and raised his other eyebrow, "At 3:30am in the morning?"

He opened it and put the phone to his ear, "Lee? What are you doing-"

"MY YOUTHFUL COMPANION! GAARA! HAS BEEN TAKEN! VAMPIRES!"

Neji's eyes narrowed, when he killed that messenger from Itachi, he had no idea that the stupid Uchiha would overreact this much. He growled, this was unforgivable. "And what do you propose?"

"OTHER HUNTERS ARE COMING TO SAVE HIM! WE JUST HAVE TO-"

Neji ignored him and hung up. He glared at the sky and jumped as hard and as high as he could. He soared through the sky, zipping as fast as he could, from rooftop to rooftop, jumping as soon as he had leverage. He could feel his rage growing more and more with each step. His teeth began to grow longer and sharper and his eyes grew red and narrowed into bloody slits. These traits were hereditary to the Hyuuga clan of vampires, just like the red eyes that belonged only to them. He didn't know what he did to get Itachi to lock him when his family was crushed, but even that was something of which he could let go. He did, have a guess.

**-Flashback (Which is actually from Itachi's view)-**

Itachi stared out the window, Orochimaru had been missing again for the third time that week. He knew where he went too. Ever since that Hyuuga boy, had been born and reached that mischievous age of a hundred, Orochimaru started going everywhere with him. At first, Itachi had thought that he was just being nice, getting on the head family's good side, but hour long visits turned into three hour walks, then the entire day. Pretty soon, Orochimaru would leave whenever he had a spare moment.

Itachi bit his lip when Neji and Orochimaru appeared at the door, they seemed to be talking seriously.

They always talked as much as possible. In fact, Orochimaru's things started disappearing, and he started saving every penny he had. If he had been a more jealous person, he would have been worried and even thought that maybe...Maybe he planned on running away...With Neji...

Itachi's heart thumped, he hadn't thought of that. He stared at them with more anger than before. They were still talking, only this time they were whispering. They were actually standing close to each other, talking like they had some sort of secret to hide. Finally, Neji turned and left, while Orochimaru walked inside. Itachi noted that he closed the door quietly, probably hoping that Itachi hadn't seen them and thought he was sneaking in.

"Hey," said Itachi, appearing at the top of the stairs with his hands on his hips "What are you doing?"

Orochimaru froze and stared at him, "Hey babe," he said, "I thought you were visiting your brother"

Itachi scowled, "That was last week" His lover gulped, "Oh"

Itachi suddenly appeared in front of him, "You realize you're acting extremely suspicious" Orochimaru smiled, "Really? Well, you are giving me a look"

"JUST TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH THAT HYUUGA!"

Orochimaru shrank back, he kept quiet though, knowing that any lie he tried would be seen through, and he didn't want to be found out. Itachi noticed, and felt more anger well up inside of him. "YOU BASTARD!" He yelled punching him in the stomach, "HOW COULD YOU?"

Orochimaru coughed and fell over, clutching his stomach, "You, you're jumping to conclusions" he wheezed, glaring up at Itachi, "Nothing's going on"

"BULL SHIT!"

He shoved the man over so that he lay flat on his back, he black hair fanned out beneath him. "ITACHI!" he exclaimed, "NOTHING IS GOING ON BETWEEN NEJI AND I!"

"I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!" Screamed Itachi punching the floor beside his head and leaving a sizeable hole in the marble surface, "I LOVE YOU! I FUCKING LOVE YOU AND PROMISED TO KEEP YOU FOREVER AND...AND YOU DO THIS!" Orochimaru's eyes widened as Itachi's mouth suddenly descended upon his. His long hair was getting pulled as Itachi caused him to yelp, opening his mouth to attack. And attack it was.

The next thing he knew, his tongue was getting sucked and bitten, Itachi was running his pointed fangs along his lower lip and he could taste his own blood, filling up their mouths. He flinched in pain as Itachi drew away, hardly loosening his jaw.

"I'm going to make it so you never forget me..."

Orochimaru's eyes widened in fear of what he knew the Uchiha to be capable of, "Wait, Ita-" His voice cut off in a scream of pain, as Itachi thrust into him with no lubrication or preparation. For mysteriously without him noticing, their pants had been removed and Itachi had moved between his legs.

Itachi began thrusting in and out with animalistic force. Orochimaru let his head fall back as he let out noises of pain that filled the whole house. Despite these, Itachi kept up his pace, not letting up for a moment. He felt tears running down his cheeks as his lover kept moving, in and out. Orochimaru began panting in pleasure, the pain from earlier long gone. Itachi's breath was ragged as well, as he found himself unable to feel anything but lust for the man underneath him anymore.

They came like that, grinding and thrusting against each other, their screams and moans of pleasure mixed together. After taking a few minutes to catch their breaths, Itachi stood up, "What's going on?"

Orochimaru sighed and rested against the floor, "I was hoping to save this until next month"

"What is next month?"

Itachi received a glare that told him it was obviously very important to him, "Our anniversary"

"...I know?"

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow, "You're waiting till next month"

**-End Flashback-**

Itachi smirked at the struggling redhead chained to the stone wall in the basement of his mansion. No one would bother him there, except the human slaves who brought him food. The boy was angry, but it would all be for the better. Itachi had no interest in hurting him, only in preserving the vampyric race. He hoped that Neji would be able to understand that.

"Why am I here?" spat Gaara, still kicking, but having calmed enough to start demanding answers from the other pointy tooth. Seriously? Did these guys have like, a sadist club?

Itachi chuckled, "Don't worry human, your lover will be here soon no doubt. He cares for you far too much not to come"

"I don't have a lover"

"Huh?" Itachi turned to him, noting with small amusement that he had a sour, annoyed look on his face, rather than one of the usual fearful expressions that every other prisoner had wore, "Are you not Hyuuga Neji's lover? You have his scent on you"

Gaara's eye twitched, "I SHOWERED LIKE A MILLION TIMES! HE RAPED ME I TELL YA! RAPE!"

Itachi let his eyes wander everywhere is confusion and more amusement, before he settled back on the redhead, "I see...You're in denial"

"NO! I'M not in denial! NOW LET ME GO! OR I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL MURDER YOU AND HARVEST YOUR ORGANS FOR BEER MONEY!"

Itachi stared at him, while slowly backing out of the room, "You kinda have issues, so I'll leave you to talk on that little goblin on your shoulder"

"HE HATES YOU TOO!"

"Of course he does" said Itachi closing the door, "Man, that Hyuuga has weird taste.

* * *

End Chapter

Thank You everyone who reads! I love you so much!

Because I like to have fun with life and my microphone, I am going to email everyone who leaves their email address an attachment with a voice recorded thank you on it, because the bastards who run this sight wont let me put them in the beginning of the chapters. BUT YOSH! KEEP THEM REVIEWS COMING! YOU KEEP ME AND AKAI ALIVE!

And the chic, the groupie...XD I just had to put that in! WOO! Hmm...Lee/Kankurou? ...0.0 I just gave myself nightmares)


	7. What are your measurements?

Oh my god. Is this really an update? Are your eyes deceiving you? Why no no. Your vision is perfectly fine. Akai after a year long hiatus has finally returned. And she brings with her crack plots to boot. But before i start new things i should probably finish the old, no?

If you forgot about this fic then dude go back to the very beginning and read it. It's funny! Especially the last chapter because Marlo thought it would be funny to include me as the groupie. Tee hee.

Anyway. On to the chapter. It's kind of short, but when do i seriously write long chapters? Never. That's when.

I disclaim.

* * *

It had been hours... so many bloody hours. Gaara's wrists were bleeding from struggling against the chains he was bound with. Why did they get him while he was sleeping? If he had regular clothes on he'd have weapons with him. Or at least a paperclip. Or a pencil!! Gaara could do so many things with a pencil. Like stab Neji in the kneecap.

"That's right! It's that bastards fault!" he reminded himself staring at his shoulder. That goblin looked pretty real by now... "You're insane" said a voice. Gaara looked at his shoulder goblin suspiciously. "You're real" he said wide eyed.

"Over here" said the voice. Gaara looked over and was faced with a man who had... gray skin?

"Dude why are you alive?" the redhead said looking awe-stricken. "What do you mean?" Orochimaru asked raising a brow. "Like... if i ever saw a kid with gray skin I'd just kill him."

"...Why?"

"Because he's bound to be evil, i mean... He has GRAY skin!"

"...Wow... Neji has weird taste" he said leaving the readhead to his goblin.

-Meanwhile-

Neji was creating a bloodbath at the entrance of Itachi's establishment. Once he was a bit calm he looked around to see if there was anyone alive. "You there" he said catching someone that was trying to silently sneak away. "Where is he?"

-A few minutes later-

Kankuro and the team he'd managed to complete stood at the entrance with raised eebrows. Who in the world did this? Lee ran up to the group and looked over the mess "oh! Neji must have gotten here first!"

"Neji?" they all said at once looking at each other. "Pay up" Shikamaru said suddenly causing Chouji to sigh and mutter something about Shikamaru being able to see into the future. "What's that all about?" Kiba asked. "Oh. When Neji transferred in Chouji said he was a vampire and i said he was a hunter."

-Back in the basement-

_Sleep..._ the voice said gently. Gaara's vision was slowly beginning to blur. He'd been arguing with his goblin on the best way to escape for over an hour. But sleep seemed so welcoming right now...

What seemed like days later the redheads eyes slowly fluttered open. "You're finally awake" Neji said smiling at the boy in his arms. Gaara let out a silent scream and jumped away from the pointy-toothed rapist.

"Come on, we're down the hall from the bastards that kidnapped you" Gaara decided to put his hatred for the pale-eyed freak behind him for the time being. He still needed his revenge on Sasuke.

"Do you want a weapon?"

"Do you have a paperclip?"

"...No"

"How about a pencil?"

"I have a pen"

"That will do"

When he received the pen he stabbed Neji in the eye and then ran down the hall and burst into the last room. Itachi put a hand up to silence them "give me a minute!" he said staring intently at his television. "Neo Nazi's have peaceful protest? Britney Spears pregnant again? Opra Winfrey gives away hump back whales on her talk show???" he yelled wide eyed.

Kisame raised a brow at the screen "can't the government do something about that?"

"What, like blow up the TMZ headquarters?"

"No... though that's a good idea too. I meant like not allow people like that to reproduce"

"I have this whole plan on selective breading. These fools must stop spawning!"

Neji removed the pen from his eye and he and Gaara looked at one another and nodded. "On second thought... we'd like to join you guy's" Neji said causing Itachi to grin. "Glad to hear it! What are your measurements? We have special club cloaks cause we're cool like that!"

-Meanwhile in the basement-

Itachi and Orochimaru sat in front of the stonewall Gaara was chained to and shared some popcorn.

"I kind of like him" the Uchiha said shoving a handful of popcorn in his mouth.

"He's pretty weird, yelling like that in his dreams. I wonder why he's giving out his measurements..."

"I don't know but we should keep him around for laughs"

"Ok"

* * *

That's it. I told you it was short, ne?

And in case i lost anyone there that whole last part in Itachi's room was Gaara dreaming. Neji and Gaara haven't joined them. Though that would be funny.

Review because it makes us happy. And once we get five reviews maybe Marlo will decide she wants to write the next chapter. And then you can finally read a long chapter. Because she's good at that.


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